The Adventures of Bear and Butterfly

Hello again! It’s been a while and much has happened since our trip back to NZ in March. These days I’m finding it hard to make time for the things I want to do, despite not working. I really have no idea how my day gets consumed… I know a lot of it has to do with the laptop and the bazillions of distractions I can find there- for instance; just now I received an email from a company with a 50% off discount code, so I’ve just done a bit of shopping. I’m determined to make an improvement there… eventually.

So, what have we been up to? Spring and summer saw us spending a bit of time in the garden- there were a few warm sunny days in the UK this year. We had a go at growing veggies from seed, which wasn’t much of an encouraging experience. We had rows of lettuce, cauliflower, broccoli, some tomatoes and capsicum, spring onion, pak choy, rainbow chard, beans and silverbeet. The romaine lettuce was pretty prolific and tasty; beans, spring onion and silverbeet gave us a few good meals but the rest didn’t grow so well, or at all. Parsley and nasturtiums are fairly reliable plants, and the morning glory showed its weedy-ness by wrapping itself around a few trees.

I joined a talking therapies group in April and May facilitated by Psychological Wellbeing Practitioners. Previously to the group, I’d been experiencing a period of depression with some anxiety, so this was a potential remedy which I took on the advice of my GP- definitely beats the meds she first suggested! We learnt a lot about managing the messages we tell ourselves and the patterns we get into, using Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. I feel a lot more able to recognise when I am about to go into those modes, and feel confident I can get myself out of that frame of mind before things become disastrous.

I had a go at oil painting in April. I was really lucky as I was the only student in the class so I got a lot out of it. I have a massive canvas waiting downstairs which I hope to do something interesting with- maybe a Pohutukawa tree, ala Tony Ogle. Not that I have his skills… yet!

Another new thing I had a go at was Hot Yoga. I really enjoyed this style- the room is heated to 42degrees so you get a good sweat on as well as are more able to get into the positions. I’ll definitely get back into it at a later date.

Lastly, I did a bit of study with the Open University. Just one course called “Counselling- Exploring Fear and Sadness”. It’s a module in their Foundation Degree in Counselling, so hopefully I will have accrued 30 credits towards the degree, which is made up of 240 credits. Most of the study for the degree is facilitated through further education colleges, but the ones near me don’t seem to offer all the required courses, so I’m not sure if I’ll be able to do the degree if I decide that would be desired. I really enjoyed this course- we learnt six different approaches to counselling- psychoanalytic, person-centred therapy, cognitive behaviour therapy, existential, mindfulness and systemic. The existential approach resonates the most with my understanding of life so I’d like to explore that further. I completed four essays for the course and I know I’ve passed three of those assessments. I won’t find out about the last one until late December.

Bodra and I have done a bit of travel together, but he’s done a lot on his own for work. Since May, Bodra has been to Munich, Barcelona, Berlin, Stuttgart, Helsinki, Copenhagen, Oregon (USA), Knutsford… he has been really busy!

We visited Madrid in early May, quite a pretty city. Bodra had work there so we left on the weekend and had a couple days together exploring the city- gardens, plazas, cathedrals, museums, staying in a hostel for the first night and then at the Westin Palace. We saw the famous painting called ‘Guernica’ at the Museo Nacional Reina Sofia, and at the Prado Museum I saw a really beautiful painting of the holy trinity by Jose de Ribera.

We also took the train out to Toledo and had a good wander around that city, and finished our Madrid experience by tasting a cultural mid-meal- Chocolate and Churros at the historic Maestro Churrero. This is a full mug of not particularly sweet thick chocolate and an underwhelming pastry/biscuit thing. I’d rather go for Milo and Tim Tams.

Towards the end of May we saw Flight of the Concords at the Wembley Arena. I couldn’t believe how many people were there to see Brett and Jermaine- it was a sharp contrast to when we saw them at the St James many years ago, but the capacity isn’t quite on the same level. We also saw Shapeshifter at Shepherd’s Bush Empire, and the Hang Drummer, Manu Delago in a band called Taalis Timeline at a venue inside a cinema complex in Brixton. Paul accompanied me to see the Deftones at the Brixton Academy whilst Bodra was in stinky Helsinki, and Bodra went to a warehouse dance party to see Prometheus with Kim and Ezra.

A friend from my days in Christchurch, Jolene Hutchings, came to Europe in May. We visited her in London and she stayed with us a couple times in Reading. She’s back in NZ now after a short but full-on jaunt around Europe. Now we have Lauren’s younger brother Luke, and his girlfriend Lou staying with us until the middle of December.

Kim and I went to the Eden Project in Cornwall in early June. We had a lovely time wandering around the gardens (Lost Gardens of Heligan as well as Eden Project) and at night we lay outside for a bit watching bats flying above us. I tried scallops for the first time in ages when we had dinner in a nearby fishing village called Charlestown. Can’t say I’ll be going back for more.

Carolyn came to visit for two weeks in June. We got out of Reading a couple times together- first up to Great Yarmouth to escape the beautiful sunny weather we’d been enjoying to take in the wind, rain and grey skies of the Norfolk Wetlands. With the added bonus of discovering delicious honey fudge, it wasn’t so terrible. We also went into London to visit Tony and Liz to see their new home which they’d just moved into. Hopefully Bodra and I will visit them again shortly- they have a pretty fabulous bath which I’d love to try out! Afterwards we went back into London to the Southerner in Temple and met up with Paul and our friends for a celebration of his 30^th. We also had some news to share as just that week I had just discovered my pregnancy! (Woohoo!!!) Lastly, we took Carolyn to the Cotswolds (I drove!) where Bodra went on his Falconry experience and we wandered around Batsford Park Arboretum.

I had my first scan at the end of June- I was a bit worried as I’d been having some scary cramps. Dewi went with me to the hospital as Bodra was away at Stuttgart again for work, so it was lovely having her support. Thankfully there was a heartbeat, so we were able to feel relaxed about the situation. We celebrated by going out to the Herb Farm near Sonning Common, quite an idyllic spot with loads of different plants I hadn’t seen before, including a fantastic, twisty hazel tree.

At the beginning of July we went into London to visit Kim and Ez and help them move into their new apartment- no more Diamond House! Instead they are just a short walk from there in Kira Building. They have a really lovely apartment with a fantastic balcony brimming with Kim’s plants. The following day we met Nik and Dawn and went to a theatre in the South Bank Centre to watch Bionic Concepts- an unusual display of a man-made floating Seal and Octopus. They were controlled by remote but it was quite amazing how quickly we started to relate to them as if they were real, especially the Seal with its curious head peering at each spectator. You kind of felt submerged in a space-like world where such creatures may exist.

In preparation for the Ozora festival in August, we took our new tent for a test drive down to Dorset in July with Kim and Ezra. We all wanted to see Badgers so I managed to figure out a place where we could do that in Dorset. We spent some of the afternoon at a beach in Studland- not much to rave about there, loads of dogs (we love Border Terriers!), a few divers, dozens of little boats anchored in the water and loads of families enjoying the sun. I wasn’t tempted to get in the water- all those boats just made me think the water wouldn’t be all that clean, but Bodra braved it and lives to tell the tale. In the evening we settled into a Badger Hide and waited for the furry creatures to make an appearance. It wasn’t long before we noticed a rustle in the long grass and a little black and white head peered out, gauging the security of the area before launching into a fervent nuzzle in the grass to seek the peanuts lying in wait. The Badgers didn’t do much else besides eat peanuts so we soon had our fill of badger action and made our way to the local pub for some dessert and a game or two of grass. The following morning we took Kim and Ez out to see the Cerne Abbas chalk drawing- a hillside with a white outline in the grass of a naked man with a club. It is meant to be a fertility symbol so I was hoping it would deliver some majick on Kim and Ez, but I guess I’ll just have to be patient.

Bodra’s family in Canada had a lot to celebrate in July and August- his cousin Jamie and Cynthia were married on July 9^th and two of his cousins Bevan and Blair both had children. Tara gave birth to Graydon Kyle Howell on August 5^th at 5am, and Laura gave birth to Avery London later that month.

We visited Budapest, Hungary (I always thought Budapest was in India- silly me!) in August for the Ozora festival. Bodra and I arrived the night before our friends and enjoyed a massive down pour whilst waiting for Shpongle. We were mostly sheltered, huddling under bivouacs around a chai stall amongst other festive people. It was quite atmospheric, like we were battling a storm at sea with one of the vendors shouting out to grab the sails. Eventually the rain let up a bit but the entire festival grounds were now a soggy, muddy mess. Lots of hay was laid down in the market areas and by the stages. Shpongle soon came on so Bodra and I enjoyed a dance whilst dodging the rain.

Over the next couple days we were joined by Kim, Ezra, Dan, Liz, Russell and few of his friends. The weather was generally very warm, with patches of rain and lots of lightning in the evening. A neat feature of the festival was that there were loads of people there accompanied by their very well-behaved dogs, even though the majority of them were off-leash. A fair number of kids as well- nice to see they were wearing hearing protection as the music was very thuddy.

Bodra and I had quite a disaster trying to get back to Budapest at the end of the festival, as the bus we were booked on didn’t turn up. We’d left ourselves a small margin of time for which to make our flight that evening, which resulted in a very expensive holiday with new transport, accommodation, meals and new flights. Lesson learned. Luckily Bodra had accrued enough points so our stay in a very flash hotel was free. We felt quite manky turning up to the swish hotel in our mud encrusted shoes and grimy skin, but it was a very luxurious end to our trip.

Since our trip to Prague we’d been keeping things pretty low-key in preparation for our first trip back home in nearly four years.  Winter kept us indoors for most of season, the snow giving us an excuse for hibernating.  We enjoyed Christmas with the Zilberberg’s again, creating a pavlova for the occasion.  Paul kept us company for New Years and we made an epic feast out of the Stone’s Cook Book “Torta Mexicana” recipe- alternating layers of cornmeal pancakes, refritos, potato-egg-sour cream-coriander mash, cheddar cheese and mango.  Very delicious!  One New Years day we went into Wimbledon to watch Avatar in 3D, an absolutely stunning movie, then we joined Lauren for a meal at an Indian restaurant- fitting given that she was off to India for two months the following Monday!

I had a day in London in mid January learning about Art Therapy, and I’d love to be able to become an Art Therapist.  Just perhaps not in the UK as the fees are well beyond our capacity.  We joined Kim and Ez that evening and went out to the Inspiral Cafe in Camden for a feral meal.  Isn’t it funny how you get to a certain age (adulthood?) and all your social gatherings go from revolving around partying to eating?  Or is it just me?

Waimarama turned 9 (almost double digits oh my goodness!) on January 17th.  I created a birthday snow caterpillar for him…

Ez, Kim, Bodra and I went to the Veolia Environment Wildlife Photographer of the Year 2009 exhibition at the Natural History Museum in London.  We loved this photograph of the golden King Penguin chick staring at the photographers footprints on the black sand.

I started volunteering at the Reading Association for the Blind.  I had spotted a sign in the store, Hobby Craft, asking if I’d like to learn how to basket weave and also do some volunteer work, which sounded agreeable to me.  So I went down to the centre at Walford Hall and met the Manager, Dawn Singleton.  The RAB is like a social gathering for people with varying degrees of visual impairment, functioning around art activities.  Some members are able to weave so make willow trays or cane baskets.  Others have limited dexterity so make greeting cards.  There is also a space for music appreciation, and sometimes they take on other art projects.  I volunteered over half a dozen times before we went to NZ and also did a little fund-raising at our local Tesco supermarket.   Whilst at the centre I would spend my time talking with different members and helping with the cards.  I’ve been instructed on how to guide a visually-impaired person; it’s best to have them hold onto your elbow.  One of the facilitators, Catherine, showed me a beautiful wool mural, where all the participants had knitted various parts to create a countryside farm scene, complete with animals, a tractor, pub and the RAB mini-bus.  It’s been quite a positive experience being involved with the RAB as it’s gotten me out of shell a little bit more.

Bodra went into London on the last weekend of January for Paul’s London stag do.  His mates dressed him up in an aussie shirt, put a hat with corks on his head and tied an inflatable kangaroo to him.  Then they proceeded to get him really drunk at various places.  Apparently Paul was wrapped up in bubbly packaging for his NZ party as Rachael wanted to ensure he was kept safe.

Rachael’s UK Hen was a bit more sedate comparably, but lots of fun.  On the evening of Waitangi Day, I joined Rachael, Kim, Alanna and a couple of Rachael’s friends whom I had never met before at a lovely cafe called “The Haberdashery” in a part of London I hadn’t visited before- Crouch End.  We enjoyed all sorts of goodies in a tapas style and many flutes of champagne, glasses of wine and cocktails were elegantly sipped.  I didn’t participate in the drinking however as that morning I had happily discovered that I was pregnant!  I had woken from a lovely dream where I was standing in ‘the kitchen’ (not our present kitchen) holding our baby girl (toddler size) and giving her lots of belly kisses and cuddles, and keeping her at bay from a prowling cat.  I felt like the dream was a visitation, so decided to do a test which had very pleasing results!  & how wonderful to be able to soon share the news face-to-face with our family.

The following day we joined Noa in her 3rd Birthday celebrations at the Zilberberg residence.  Delicious cake David!

The day of our flight to NZ we tried our best to tire ourselves out.  Kim and Ezra were staying with us so we went out for a walk along the Thames, from Maidenhead to Bourne End.  Then homeward bound that evening!  We flew out on Saturday night, having a fuel stop in Bangkok which caused us a lot of stress.  We got off the plane with our bottles of water, immediately went through security despite being transit and had the water taken off us.  So we bought more water at the airport, only to find we had to go back through security to get to our gate, which resulted in having the water confiscated again.  I hadn’t even opened my bottle, and then we had to wait around for a fair while in the nearly sweltering departure area- HARRUUMMPPHH!!!  We arrived in Sydney early Monday morning and as we had over five hours before we needed to fly out, we escaped the airport and went to Newtown to visit my Aunty Jo.

We met Aunty Jo at her new apartment on King’s Road and drank some tea while Aunty Jo collected herself- it was a pretty rude awakening really having visitors arrive after 7am.  But you can’t say no to family!  Heh!  We went for a walk along the main street and stopped at an arty cafe for breakfast.  Then we wandered around Newtown some more, going through Camperdown Memorial Rest Park.

Back on the plane, the time couldn’t go fast enough for our weary bodies.  We didn’t manage to get much rest throughout the flights, but at least we knew we didn’t have a demanding schedule upon arrival.  Mum and Dad were waiting for us and also Waimarama which was a big surprise.  He has grown so much, nearly as tall as me, but I can still pick him up.  Just.

Driving through West Auckland was quite eery.  The pace of New Zealand life is so much different from the UK, due to the population difference of course, as I was thinking “Where is everybody?”  We got home to Mum and Dad’s abode in Henderson Heights and my brother Shannon was there, so I was well on the way to feeling maximum levels of family adoration!  I had a good explore of our parents’ garden which has grown so much over the years and is something to be proud of.  Michelle soon joined us for dinner so once everyone was settled at the dining table we shared our good news which was well received.

Our first full day in NZ we took it fairly easy.  Our body clocks were a bit haywire so we were up before the sun rose and joined Mum, Dad and Jimi for the morning walk around the Vintage Park.  Cicadas buzzing and the air already warm… gotta love Summer time in NZ!  We headed into Henderson for lunch and a spot of shopping, and dropped in at Sarah’s home.  She had both her girls home for the day so we were well entertained by Sophie’s ballerina antics.

The following day, after a trip to the dentist, Bodra, Dad and I made our way up North to the Tutukaka Coast, where we met up with Michael in his RV.  We had a good chat and wander around the area and then enjoyed dinner in the RV with our personal chef.  We shared our news with Michael and he was really overjoyed.

On Thursday we woke early for breakfast and then made our way to the Dive Tutukaka centre.  We met up with Russell and soon we were on a boat heading out for the Poor Knights Islands Marine Reserve.  Michael didn’t join us as he had been out on the water the previous day was still suffering from the motion and experience of diving.  I was quite nervous as the water was very rough heading out, so I remained in the cabin of the boat, trying to watch the walls and not get too nauseous.

We arrived at the Island at Jan’s Tunnel.  Dad and I went snorkelling as Bo and Russell went diving.  As the water was fairly stirred up there wasn’t too much to see- nudibranch, blue maomao, trigger-fish, demoiselle, snapper and trevally.  The snapper became quite prevalent when Dad exited the water and immediately hurled.  We then went around to the Rikoriko Cave (which means waning light or twilight) which is on record as being the biggest sea cave in the world.  The acoustics were pretty fantastic.  Apparently Pitch Black did a concert inside the cave which would’ve been awesome to behold.

Our next dive/snorkel spot was at Blue Maomao Arch.  As you swam through the archway you saw massive schools of (surprise surprise) Blue Maomao all hovering on the sides of the archway.  There was a neat rock formation on the sea bed where the fish kept swimming over it, rubbing their bodies against the rock as it helped them to dislodge the bits and pieces caught in their scales.  On our way back to the boat I noticed these small jellyfish (possibly called Salps?) gathering in the water near me.  They had these lovely edges to their bodies which had a kind of light running down through them.  Quite mesmerizing, but then I started noticing how MANY of them there were in the water with me, so I promptly got out.

The journey back to Tutukaka was pretty good, nowhere near as choppy as before.  As we left Poor Knights Island we watched rain clouds become darker, larger and closer, soon we had to leave the top of the boat which was uncovered and find shelter below.  I don’t think any of us were particularly impressed by what we saw at the Poor Knights Islands.  It may have just been the weather but perhaps the marine reserve is in serious decline?  This article seems to think so.

Back in Tutukaka, we met up with Michael again and then dad and I went to grab some dinner from the local takeaway store.  Finally I was able to indulge in my Potato Fritter craving.  Sadly the ones on offer were battered using animal fat, but I disregarded this, a poor decision on my behalf as they were far from tasty and became seagull feed.  Dad and I sat by the estuary and enjoyed our meal together with the birds.

On Friday, Bodra, Dad and I made our way to Whananaki North one of my favourite spots on the East Coast.  we had a wander over to Otamure Bay and then a swim and snorkel.  Then we missioned back to Snorkland.

I got to see the twins on Friday afternoon and stayed the night with Michelle and the boys.  On Saturday morning we left the twins to go on their Kiwi Conservation trip to Lake Wainamu.  I caught up with Kowhai as well.  Man, he’s massive.  Those boys have obviously got excellent genes for absorbing nutrition from their meals.

In the afternoon I joined Bodra at Cassels for Paul and Rachael’s wedding, the instigation for our presence in NZ.  I believe this is the first wedding where all the trimmings were accounted for, even including instructions to spontaneously sing lyrics containing the word ‘love’ to enforce Paul and Rachael to kiss, but if you were shy you could bang your wine glasses with cutlery.  Paul and Rachael of course did the first dance, which they had practised for and chose the tune ‘Everlong’ by the Foo Fighters.  A fantastic occasion and I’m really pleased we were able to join them for it!

On Sunday we got out to the Titirangi Markets before joining Paul and Rachael at Paul’s Fathers’ home out in the Waitakeres.  We sat on his deck looking out to native bush and sun that was at times too hot!  Yay for NZ Summer!  Have I already said that?

In the afternoon we joined Bodra’s friends at Bevan and Sarahs’ home in Henderson Heights, for a BBQ and to watch cricket.  We got to meet their daughter Rachel, Danijel & Inas’s daughter Violetta, Angela & Gareth’s daughter Maya, Radmilla’s daughter whose name escapes me now (ooopppsss!!).  Loads of toddlers to watch- far more interesting than cricket!  Gareth’s parents Debbie and Mike also came over so I got to meet them for the first time too.

Over the next few days we got in some Waitakere action; a bush walk to Fairy Falls with Michael and Jimi, O’Neill’s beach, Arataki Reserve Pararaha Valley.  We also met up with Inas and Violetta for lunch at a restaurant in West Gate.  Inas shared her powerful tale of giving birth to Violetta and she really inspired me.

On Friday I went to Dilworth with Michelle to watch Hemi and Te Aue perform in their school swimming sports.  Hemi and Te Aue’s arms really whirled during the backstroke, but I think they were both too interested in keeping an eye on their competitors to really focus.  Hemi did a beautiful dive for his 25m breaststroke and started off fairly even with the other swimmers, but someone else must of had more steam.  From where I was sitting I think Te Aue came in first for this event (woohoo!).

Hemi’s 50m breaststroke was pretty stellar and it looked like he came in first (woop-woop!).  Te Aue made it to fourth place for this event.  All the boys really charged for the 25m & 50m freestyle, arms were crashing into the water and feet were frantically kicking with such fury!  Poor water.

2010.03.05 Swimming Sports at Dilworth (movie playlist)

I hung out with the boys on Friday night and stayed over.  The following day Laurence had the boys so Michelle and I went to a cafe in Waiatarua called Elevation and enjoyed a tasty meal and beautiful view!

On Sunday we met up with Kenny, Danijel, Inas and Violetta at Jafa, a cafe in Grey Lynn.  I had some pretty nasty cramps during the night and a scary dream, so I wasn’t feeling too full of beans.  The atmosphere at Jafa and with our friends was very healing however.  I had a tasty Indonesian rice pudding and Bodra feasted on feta and cumin potato cakes.  It was awesome seeing Kenny again and he told us about his new son Henrik.  We had hoped to go meet him and Kenny’s new partner but unfortunately we ran out of time.

On Monday the boys were on school holidays and we got Waimarama to wag as well, so we took them all out to Goat Island, with Shannon and Michael too.  The water was really rough, most of us managed to score a couple scrapes here and there.  Bodra managed to get sunburn all over his entire back- he has a really nice tan line even now- a month later!  There wasn’t too much to be seen given the condition of the water but I spotted a couple Goat-fish and of course Trevally.  I had the most delicious Potato Fritters that night as Mum had decided it’d be best to get some fish ‘n’ chips.  I think they were deep fried with rice bran oil?  Yummy anyway.

On Tuesday morning Bodra and I took Jimi and the three eldest boys to Kitekite Falls in Piha.  We had a great walk around the lower track and up to the falls, and I enjoyed watching all the boys swim around the lower pool.  I was quite surprised to find Jimi has a penchant for branches, and Kowhai indulged Jimi’s desire to fetch into the water.  We found half a dozen eels swimming around nearby the waterfall, so obviously this part of NZ is kept pure.  Bodra got some much-needed cooling off time for his sunburn.

In the evening I went to Kura Toa Warrior School to watch Waimarama get up to mischief in his Warrior Kids class.  The children learn self-defense skills and provides experience for personal development.  I watched them learn how to turn away from someone striking at them which was quite an effective technique.

The following day Bodra was really feeling the pain from his sunburn, so he stayed at home while Mum, Dad, Michael, Shannon and I went out to Tirtiri Matangi Reserve.  We had a fabulous day walking around the island spotting various birds and I was really pleased to see the Kokako and Takahe.  We had time for a swim as well which was lovely.

You can see movies of some the birds we saw via this link.

Sarah picked me up that evening and took me out to Bethells Beach for a sit in the sand as we watched the last light of the sun disappear.  We had a good catch up and I hoped to see her again.

On Thursday Bodra and I went to visit Michelle at her Doctor’s Surgery.  She organised for me to have a blood test done to check my hormone levels to ensure the pregnancy was progressing as it should.  I’d already had a test like this five weeks previously, which had given positive results, so I wasn’t too worried about it, and it turned out to be fine also.

We then got out to Auckland City and visited Karangahape Road and Victoria Park Market in search of a Pounamu necklace for Bodra.  He now has a very beautiful treasure around his neck which he acquired from Kiwi Art.  We met up with Nathan in Ponsonby and had lunch with him at Bliss Cafe, and we returned that night to meet up with Chantal at GPK.  It was wonderful to see both Nathan and Chantal and hear about their lives.

I started coming down with the flu on Friday so I missed out on going on the RV trip with Bodra and Michael.  They visited Miranda, Kawakawa Bay, Matingarahi, Waiau Falls, Tairua and Hunua Falls.  While Bodra was away he thought he was experiencing pregnancy food cravings as he got himself an Avocado from the Wilderlands shop and he really desired a cheese and tomato sandwich.  Not his usual kind of appetite as he only likes tomatoes when they are cooked in things and avocado when it is guacamole.  I was very pleased to hear this as I love avocados.

On Friday afternoon Waimarama managed to have an accident whilst running across the monkey bars and tripping over a friends hand, which resulted in him falling and smacking his tooth into the bar, thus cracking said tooth.  So Mum was busy with him at the A&E.  I don’t think he has learnt his lesson here, and is still content to err on the side of recklessness.

On Saturday Shane took me out to Lake Wainamu- Bethells Lake on the West Coast.  We trekked across the black sand dunes and sat by the lake enjoying the sun and company.  I’m really glad I had the chance to get out there with Shane as it’s quite a special spot for both of us.

On Sunday morning Mum took me out to Michelle’s to see Kowhai for the last time.  He had Kapahaka practice that morning so Mum was taking him back to school on her way to work.  It was quite tough saying goodbye to him, as I didn’t feel like I had had enough time.  But when you’ve been away for four years and leaving again, I don’t think it’s possible to get enough time with your family to make up for the time spent a part.  I just hope by the time I do get back to NZ, Kowhai will still want to hang out with me.

Michelle, Waimarama and I spent the morning together and visited Crystal Mountain to peruse the crystals and enjoy some lunch.  Waimarama brought his lunch from home as he is on a diet of soft foods.  In the afternoon I walked Jimi with Dad around the Lower and Upper Opanuku Walkway, which was great to have time all to myself with my Dad.

On Monday Mum and I got some together time and went to Newmarket to have a fossick about for baby stuff and check out the fashion.  We found a really neat shop called The Poi Room which sells NZ art and design.  I was really taken by a print by Peter Latham called Piha Aroha, shot in the early hours of the morning with a full moon in the sky and the soft rays of dawn highlighting the foliage around Lion rock.  We met up with Lauren and her brother Luke whom I haven’t seen since early 2002 I believe.  So, eight years later!  Lovely to see his eyes are just as bright and shiny as they always were.  & isn’t his sister a foxy lady?!

On Tuesday morning Bodra and I made a quick dash out to Mokoroa Falls, one of ‘our spots’.  They’ve modified the track a bit, adding in a barrier and platform at the top and stairs all the way to the bottom.  Nice to see the Auckland Regional Council looking after these beautiful bush walks.

Carolyn arrived on Tuesday afternoon so we really had a full house and were maximising family time, with Michael outside on the road in his RV.  We met Carolyn at the airport and as soon as she was settled in the car, Bodra busted out the news which had Carolyn beaming as she does!  It was definitely the best idea to wait to share this news with everyone once we could see each other.  Lots of cuddles all around!

On Wednesday we had organised to go for an Ultrasound Scan so that our family could come and see our creation.  Bodra and I went in first to see how things were, and tragically the news was not the best.  The embryo only showed nine weeks of growth as opposed to the eleven, and there was no heart beat.  It appeared that I presented with a missed-miscarriage.  So there was nothing for our family to see and it was clear that we had a tough decision to make now.  Do I wait for the miscarriage to happen naturally?  Or take another route?

We shared the news with our family, which was devastating for all of us.  But there are positives that can be taken from this- I CAN get pregnant, and also the sonographer said my ovaries appear to be fine.   Bodra and I took some time out for ourselves to contemplate and went on the Walker Kauri Track on Mountain Road in Henderson Valley; yet another special spot for me with it’s massive Kauri Trees.  Afterwards we went back to Ponsonby for a feed at Fatimas, as we really missed their potato koftas.

In the early evening Michelle took me to see her GP to organise for me to go to the North Shore Hospital to have a Dilatation and Curretage operation.  Bodra and I then went out to the hospital with the referral.  They took more blood and then sent us home after getting me on the list for the following morning.  Lauren’s mother who works in the hospital came by to visit me and give me some support which was so kind of her.  The surgery went fine and all the staff in the hospital were so considerate.  Even the anaesthetist came by to check on me afterwards.  The nurse attending to us happened to be the Bar Manager from Bodra’s University days (such a small world) so she really looked after me.  By the afternoon I was free to eat and free to go home.  We stopped off at Jesters Pies in West Gate and Bodra grabbed a Popeye and William Tell for me.  I could really go for one of each right now… mmmm and two minute noodles (my latest odd craving).

So I took it fairly easy for what was left of our time in EnZed.  Less than 48 hours (gulp!).  On Friday morning Lauren came by to visit which gave her an opportunity to catch up with my family.  Shannon was visiting as well, so I was quite content with all the family support I was being given.  We went out to a Thai restaurant that evening and beforehand Sarah dropped by to offer some more cuddles and love.

Saturday arrived far too quickly.  We woke early in the morning and joined Mum, Dad and Jimi for a walk around the park.  Mum and I then dashed over to Michelle’s for a final farewell with Te Aue, Hemi and my sister.  Then off to the airport!  Mum, Dad, Shannon and I in one car, Bodra, Carolyn and Michael in another.  It was a hugely emotional parting and I hope to never experience that again.  Not to forget the fact that customs confiscated our massive jar of Marmite off us (destined for Ezra’s belly).

We had a stop-over in Melbourne for nearly nine hours so we met up with Mike and his girlfriend and later on with Ben.  Mike took us back to his flat and then we wandered through Flagstaff Gardens over to a pub, meeting Ben along the way.  We had a great chat together and then wandered around West Melbourne trying to find a place for dinner.  We settled on the Warung Agus, a Balinese restaurant.  I had the Apokat Mebasa Santen Misi Oong for an entree- avocado with mushroom and coconut cream sauce, and Toge for my main- traditional Balinese gado gado - steamed veges and beancurd with peanut sauce and casava crackers.

I started feeling pretty off towards the end of my meal, nauseous and faint.  We started to make our way back to Mike’s to collect our gear and head out to the airport, but by the time we’d reached his apartment (which is very cool by the way with an elevator opening straight out to his open-plan kitchen and lounge area, kind of secret agent styles) I was feeling progressively worse and incredibly anxious.  I didn’t know why I was feeling as I was, my body had begun to spasm and motion was really hard to bear.  Bodra had eaten the same meal as I and he was fine, so we could only hope that what I was experiencing would pass as quickly as it came on.  Luckily it did; once we were waiting at our gate things began to settle down and calmness came.  I can only explain it as perhaps a rush of adrenaline or some residual after-effect from the general anaesthetic I had been given on Thursday.

We sat in a row with an elderly lady named Grace seated by the window.  She had a bag so she kept giving us regular breaks and chances to get circulation happening again as she got up to empty it.  We watched loads of movies and read a fair bit.  There was one stop in Hong Kong and by Sunday afternoon we were touching down in Heathrow.  Bodra had organised a taxi for us, so we were very quickly homeward bound in our zombie-like state.

Bodra has a lovely manager who allowed him to work from home for the first week back, which made it easier getting over our loss and shifting back to the British clock.  I’ve started seeing an acupuncturist and joined a Well Being course which involves learning Cognitive Behaviour Therapy techniques to deal with anxiety and depression.  Additionally, I’ve registered with the Open University to study a module called “Exploring Fear and Sadness” which should be good for my learning.  It is a paper in the Foundation Degree in Counselling, so if I think it is worthwhile I may look into that as a possible new career.  I also had a go at doing Hot Yoga at Studio 42 degrees.  Very challenging and sweaty!  especially the ballerina inspired poses.  I aim to go back once I’ve recovered from my latest…

We went into London to Shoreditch to see Younger Brother at Cargo with Kim and Ezra.  As the sound was a bit of an assault on Ezra’s ears and they had played my favourite track “Ribbon on a Branch” early on, we left the gig well before it finished.  It’s always tricky trying to get back to Reading at a decent hour and avoiding the train which makes a dozen stops before getting to our station.  This usually means leaving things earlier than you’d like.  Unfortunately we still got caught by the slow train…

I was in hospital again our second week back for surgery- nothing serious, just wanted to be quick to get it over with as it involved being under a general anaesthetic again, which you can’t do when you’re pregnant.  Can’t say the Royal Berkshire Hospital was even on the same level as the North Shore Hospital.  They had us waiting for a number of hours for my medicine, and eventually we decided to leave as I was so hungry and tired.  I ended up picking my medicine up the following morning.

& I was back in hospital again on Good Friday.  I brought up what appeared to be a blood clot which was quite alarming, and the doctor at the out-of-hours clinic referred me to the Clinical Diagnostics Unit.  I was X-Rayed, ECG’ed, listened to and tested.  They didn’t give us any results for a number of hours and it wasn’t until I tried to discharge myself that we finally had some response.  None of the tests showed anything, but they were concerned and wanted to watch me, therefore I needed to stay the night.  Well, I wasn’t having any of that.  I was looking around and seeing the other people in my ward, who all appeared to be in varying degrees of helplessness and misery.  I didn’t belong there, so I decided to leave.  As far as I was concerned, the clot was just from having the tube down my throat which had caused some kind of irritation.  My throat was feeling rough so this seemed to be the case.  I’m going back for more tests to check my chest and respiratory in a few weeks time, but she’ll be right mate!  ;-)

So we had a chilled, chocolate fuelled, cosy Easter break watching movies and blobbing out.  The following week (last week) I started an oil painting class where I am the only student!  Brilliant!  The artist teaching me is Martin Close.  He showed me some of his current commissions, a portrait of the Mayor from London, Boris Johnson, and a couple canvases depicting softly folded fabric.  He broke down the techniques of painting with oils into easy-to-understand-and-apply steps, so I’m looking forward to continuing with him.

I turned 31 last Wednesday and Bodra gifted me with a new digital SLR camera, Panasonic Lumix G1 if that means anything to anyone.  So I should have some stunning pics coming your way soon!  Especially once we get this Raynox lens thingo which lets you take macro pics.  Dewi gifted me with some lovely tea light hanging holders which are very romantic and bright.

Last Friday night we went to see Tim Burton’s Alice In Wonderland in 3D after getting favourable recommendations from Kim and Ezra.  The Cheshire Cat, voiced by Stephen Fry, is really gorgeous with his turquoise striped fur.

Oh, and we’ve been making use of our yard recently- we’ve started a vege plot which has teeny seedlings now showing from the lettuce seeds we planted a couple weeks ago.  Very exciting!

We don’t have too many other trips planned for this year, especially as Bodra has used up most of his holiday time with our NZ trip.  We’re hoping to go to the Ozora festival in early August and join Danijel, Inas and Violetta in Croatia in the third weekend of August (busy month), and maybe go to the Caribbean for New Years.  For work Bodra has journeyed to Tel Aviv, Helsingborg in Sweden (taking a train from Copenhagen), Dublin, Knutsford and Bonn (in Germany for work).  He’ll be going to Barcelona next month for a few days.